Connect With Your Heart, Step Forward Into the Unknown + Fuel Your Fire.
Full Circle Moments in a Coffee Shop
The other morning, I met up with my newfound friend for coffee at Rustica in Minneapolis next to lake Bde Maka Ska. We enjoyed our lattes, talked, listened, and expressed feelings dreaming about the changes we want and need to see in the world. As normal as this morning may have seemed, looking back even now, it feels like the beginning of something bigger - or perhaps fuel to a fire that’s been burning for sometime now. I believe that people come in and out of our lives for reasons we may not know until much later, regardless of how long they stay or how intimate our interactions. I had a bit of a full circle moment while sitting here with her, in this place I hadn’t been in almost a decade, that I used to frequent often - - but, under very different circumstances than the heaviness we were discussing today.
About ten years ago, next door, I found the first book that inspired me to travel solo (Tales of a Female Nomad: Living at Large in the World) and the Lonely Planet books to help me plan solo adventures to Argentina, Chile and New Zealand. I remember sitting outside this coffee shop on the weekends, dreaming and planning. During this time I was in a job that sucked the life out of me. I felt stuck in a place I didn’t want to be, part of a system I couldn’t change, without a voice that could have any sort of impact on the world around me - - and all I wanted to do was be everywhere but here, constantly on the move and immersed in cultures around the world. I wanted to have the strength the speak up for what I believed in. I wanted to travel and explore and live the lives of adventure that were book-worthy, to have the romances that were cinema-worthy and to embody the fearlessness that it would take to go after these dreams and to create real-life changes in the world. I wanted to live this life I dreamed of, to embody the person I wanted to be, but had no idea how to do it and honestly had little faith that I could. But, I tried anyways and my stubbornness wouldn’t let me give up.
Almost 10 years later, it’s all come to fruition and full-circle. Those moments of “what the hell did I just get myself into,” the heartbreaks, road blocks, adventures, the times I felt lost in limbo and redirections constantly wondering how any of it could possibly work out, led me right back here. I could go down the rabbit hole connecting all of the dots to how exactly I got here, but that’s for another time. Because the most important part about this moment, is that I’m sitting here as the person I dreamt of becoming and that I’m still working towards becoming. I’m not exactly who I expected to be, nor am I doing what I thought I would be, and I couldn’t have planned it this way even if I’d tried . . . and yet I’m here.
I am grateful that I didn’t let the fear of negative what-ifs keep me from living the life I dreamt of. Did I know what I was doing? No. But, I tried anyways. I fumbled along and had to figure it out and honestly - I think that’s what a lot of people do. Contrary to what social media / media has us believing.
10 years ago I met a person, who led me to a book, which gave me the confidence to believe that what I dreamed of doing and being ‘might’ be possible. And, that ‘might’ was enough for me to try. The experiences that unfolded as I followed my heart and learned to trust my intuition, gave me the strength to quit jobs and leave people and situations that weren’t right for me, to protest in the streets for the people that couldn’t and to create a business with a mission to empower others to discover their own dreams and to find the strength to fight for themselves and others.
To say any of this was easy would be the understatement of a lifetime and to say that I always felt like I was right on track would be an outright lie.
Everyday I get a little closer to the fearless woman I hope to become one day. I’m still working my way towards her, and some days I feel so far from her. Being honest with myself and speaking my truth without fear of repercussion is still a big hurdle for me. What are yours?
If you’ve been feeling more hopeless than hopeful lately, like you’re without options, alone in your mindset, or like you have dreams that are so far out of reach you have no clue where to start…. here’s your reminder that you’re not alone.
I encourage you to take the time to allow yourself to dream. To unearth who you truly are, what you believe in and what you want to fight for. Write down the intentions you want to invite into your life and the things/people/habits/self-limiting-beliefs that you need to let go of in order to move forward. You don’t even have to act on them right now, sometimes just writing them down is enough to remind the universe that you haven’t given up. Follow your heart and learn to listen to your intuition and speak your truth out loud. I believe in you and your wildest dreams.
**Backpacking, mountain biking and rock climbing are great ways to build confidence in yourself. To push past fears and strengthen your intuition. But, also know that you don’t have to do the most intense thing or go to the furthest places - - sometimes you just have to get outside of your house, read the book that inspires you, or try the thing you’ve been putting off. :)
Whatever it is, don’t let the negative what-ifs of all that could go wrong keep you from trying.
Instead, shift your mindset to thinking “what if this does work out,” or “what if it’s even better than I imagined it could be?”
***Disclaimer: I write from my own personal experience and my writings are to be interpreted as such. I encourage you to use your own critical thinking when making decisions and major life choices. As always, you are your own person, capable of making your own decisions regardless of external influences - take no shit but do no harm. ***
